I wish it were cold outside right now. Like, see your breath cold.
While we're wishing for things, I may as well make it somewhere else... somewhere not tampa. at least, not where I am right now.
I would go for a walk.
that's really what I would do right now.
I'm not tired...
I mean, I am gtired... I'm exhausted... I'm just not sleeping.
I want to thorow on a thick pair of jeans, some nice warm sox, a long sleeved shirt and a nice warm sweatshirt and go for a walk in the biting cold.
I don't want it to be like here... I don't want to walk along a street with way too many cars driving by at 2.30 in the morning.
I also don't want it to be one of those fabled Gainesville walks... I don't want to walk along streets that are usually bustling, but are now empty. Gainesville late at night has that ghost town kind of feel to it. it's very well lit, so sometimes its hard to remember that its the middle of the night. Don't get me wrong, I've had some amazing nights walking around that particular ghost town. bringing life to roads and rooms that aren't used to seeing people in the wee hours between dusk and dawn. not sober people, at any rate.
no, that's just not what I'm feeling right now.
If I'm going to take a walk alone in the cold, I want it to be in a place that's meant to be traveled alone. maybe a path cutting through an open field, lit only by the light of the moon and the stars. a cold wind whpping across the empty space. i pull my hat low to cover my ears and i plunge my hands deep into my pockets. I breathe slowly, and every time I exhale I can see the my breath freeze in midair, right befor emy eyes.
There's a forest out to my left. I've been in it many times, but not right now It's just a little too dark to be woandering around in the woods... tonight it's just the path through the fields.

laying here with my eyes closed and a nice mix of phoenix, tegan and sarah, and the yeah yeah yeahs playing on my computer; just laying here thinking of tht walk in the cold has got me feeling more relaxed and more tired than when I started. And really, that was the point.

I'm going o try this whole "sleep" thing all over again one more time....

If i'm not asleep iwthin the next 30 minutes, please, call mr sandman for me and have him send something my way. i'd be much obliged.