she tore apart my paper heart and let the pieces rain down on the street below like confetti
....
I wrote that this morning... not sure why, but I had the image in my head when I woke up. I was in an apartment overlooking a city street. It was relatively early in the morning.... I was in an open living room clutching at my chest, looking up at her. She was on a balcony about ten feet away from me, tearing up my heart (which happened to be made out of paper) and letting the pieces fall to the street below. A group of people in suits stopped as they were hit by the falling pieces and looked up to see a steady stream of confetti falling from the sky. They dropped thier briefcases and started dancing while I fall to my knees two dozen floors above them.
... so yeah, that was the image stuck in my head as I ate my breakfast.
....
I've decided to play a little game, let's see how long I let it last.... at 10:57 tonight I reset my iTunes playlist to include every song on my computer. I sorted them alphabetical by song and turned off shuffle and repeat. Let's see how long it takes me to listen to every single song on my computer without skipping. That's going to be the hardest part... not skipping. But... we shall see. I wasn't paying attention, so I actually started at the end of the alphabet, so right now I'm listening to 5 Times Out of 100 by HotHotHeat. Now comes 2 different versions of 45 by Shinedown. First accoustic, then not. :)
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I've noticed that I overuse the smiley face. Totally and completely. I mean, I use it in emails, blogs, texts, ims.... everything. In fact, I've been known to use it multiple times in a single text. I think I need to temper my smileys..... I think. Here's the thing, though. I really do smile a lot. I mean, a LOT. My cheeks hurt today. Not because I was pretending to be a chipmunk and stuffing my cheeks with cashews... nay... they hurt because I was smiling, grinning and laughing all flippin' day. For serious. They hurt. Maybe I'll try not to smile at all tomorrow and see how it goes.
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And I'm staring down the barrel of a 45.... swimming through the ashes of another life... no real reason to accept the way things have changed... staring down the barrel.... and I'm staring down the barrel of a 45 and now I'm swimming through the ashes of another life and there's no real reason to accept the way things have changed staring down the barrel of a 45----------
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ok, tonight is going to be a multiple blogger... first this one, and then the next. I just wanted to get some random stuff out of the way before I got to my real blog. Not that this blog isn't real... it's just that the other blog is going to be a story and i didn't want to clutter it up with other random thoughts, though I'm sure while I'm writing I'll be distracted and write random things in it or not have it go the way I mean it to go or maybe some other strange transgression.... who knows? Not me. and I'm pretty sure YOU don't know either.
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Actually, before I even go write that blog, I'm going to write an email to a group of people on FB. yay email!