There are monsters under your bed

I remember being scared to death of falling asleep. This was back when I was a kid. I was still living in New York, so I was no older than seven. I wouldn't sleep with the lights on, or even a nightlight because that was childish, but I did keep a flashlight under my pillow. It was a small one, about the size of a zippo. I got it at the Ringling Bro's, Barnum and Bailey Circus. It was navy blue with a yellow top to it and a clown painted on the side in yellow. That flashlight was the only thing I had to keep me safe. To keep the darkness from closing in a little too tightly. I can remember so many nights that I fell asleep curled in a little ball in the corner of my bed, in the corner of my room, gripping that little light. I felt that, even if it wasn't on, just having it near me, just holding it, would be enough to keep away the darkness.

I lost that flashlight a long time ago. I won't get into the details, because they're not important. What's important is that it's gone. My light. My safety. Lost forever. It's kind of funny, thinking back on that. When I had that light, when I had that tallisman against the darkness, I felt safe from all the evils in the world. Once it was gone, though, I just decided that being afraid all the time just wasn't worth it. Even if the night was filled with monsters, that flashlight was not going to keep me safe. Nothing would. So I slept knowing that, yes, there are evils in this world and they would continue to be there whether I wanted them to be there or not. I slept knowing that there were just so many things that were utterly out of my control, so I thought about all those things that I could control. The most important thing, though, is that I slept.

And I think that's what I'm going to do now. Sleep easy, dear reader, and know that there probably are monsters under your bed and there's nothing you can do about it... so... tomorrow... let's make snowcones.